Anthrax Tea Bag Smuggling Bead Witch

I ordered some beads for my jewelry business. Ok. Great. When I got the package, I noticed a strange smell coming out of it.

OK, maybe it wasn't anthrax.

OK, maybe it wasn’t anthrax.

“I sure as hell hope they didn’t mail me anthrax.”

Yeah. That was what came to mind. I don’t even know what anthrax smells like, but I imagine it smells like something in a package of beads that I’m not expecting.

As it turns out, the smell was a black tea bag. Tea bags in bead strands. That’s different. Why would you do that?

Imagination comes running again!

The bead seller is really a witch and smuggler. Not very good at either, apparently. She means to put the tea bag (along with a number of its compatriots) in packets of illicit drugs and Mystical things to disguise their odor with the scent of anthrax-laden-bead-scent-which-resembles-black-tea. Unfortunately she puts a tea bag (though where its compatriots went, I do not know) into my bead package, thus ensuring her imminent capture by the Legal Powers That Be. While she’s in jail, all her beads will be confiscated by an elderly Asian uncle she is in debt to, who discovers that many of the beads are not what they seem. In fact, some of the beads are made of the illicit substances she was arrested for. He makes a small fortune selling off the beads one by one and trades a few for a twisted dwarf slave. Others are made of… well, when the twisted dwarf slave peels one of them open, he’s in for the ride of his life and never has to worry about the elderly Asian uncle beating him again.

The moral of the story: Imagination is a wild beast that runs off and plays with dwarves and illicit secular and Mystical substances that may or may not smell like anthrax or black tea.

Image credit: Me! LOL


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